Big Gay Fancy Camp

Pete and I got married! Whaaa?! Yeah, we sure did. This page is for me to share our experience with the world: for family and friends to relive the fun; for other queer and not-so-queer people to steal resources and ideas; and to shout from the mountaintop: I LOVE PETER!





Welcome, dear friends.
We are gathered here on this deep winter day
to celebrate the love that Peter and Alex have for one another,
and to recognize and witness their decision
to journey forward in their lives
as husbands, partners, and confidantes.

Over the last eight years,
Alex and Peter have gone out into the world,
together and apart, in search of adventure,
beauty, truth, and joy. Among the things
they have discovered in their travels
has been the love which has taken root in their hearts,
A sturdy, solid love. A love that continues to grow.

You are here today
because you have played your part
in helping Peter and Alex’s love grow,
and now we have another role to play:
to open our hearts in celebration
and our eyes and ears in witness

POEM #1 {KJ}

“A Blessing for Wedding”
By Jane Hirshfield

Today when persimmons ripen
Today when fox-kits come out of their den into snow
Today when the spotted egg releases its wren song
Today when the maple sets down its red leaves
Today when windows keep their promise to open
Today when fire keeps its promise to warm
Today when someone you love has died
or someone you never met has died
Today when someone you love has been born
or someone you will not meet has been born
Today when rain leaps to the waiting of roots in their dryness
Today when starlight bends to the roofs of the hungry and tired
Today when someone sits long inside his last sorrow
Today when someone steps into the heat of her first embrace
Today, let this light bless you
With these friends let it bless you
With snow-scent and lavender bless you
Let the vow of this day keep itself wildly and wholly
Spoken and silent, surprise you inside your ears
Sleeping and waking, unfold itself inside your eyes
Let its fierceness and tenderness hold you
Let its vastness be undisguised in all your days


Like all living things, Alex and Peter live within a community of others.
Let us share in a moment of silence,
during which we honor the peace and beauty underlying all the cosmos,
from the stars, to our spinning planet, to these mountains in which we have gathered.

Let us honor the unity of all living things,
which in its astounding diversity, is still all bound by the same fabric.
And let us marvel at the strange gift of love,
which Peter and Alex share together,
and which we know to be true and free and full of awesome mystery.

[Moment of Silence]

I invite each of you
as members of Peter and Alex’s community of love
to show your support for Peter and Alex
by answering the following question
with shouts of joy:

Will you
do everything you can
to care and love for these two people
who love one another,
who love life,
and who love you?

[Everybody shouts!]


Jenni Johnson singing “Your Song” by Elton John

READING #1 {Dorothy}

“I Know What Love Is” – A Letter from Ansel Adams to his friend Cedric

June 19, 1937

Dear Cedric,

A strange thing happened to me today. I saw a big thundercloud move down over Half Dome, and it was so big and clear and brilliant that it made me see many things that were drifting around inside of me; things that related to those who are loved and those who are real friends.

For the first time I know what love is; what friends are; and what art should be.

Love is a seeking for a way of life; the way that cannot be followed alone; the resonance of all spiritual and physical things. Children are not only of flesh and blood — children may be ideas, thoughts, emotions. The person of the one who is loved is a form composed of a myriad mirrors reflecting and illuminating the powers and thoughts and the emotions that are within you, and flashing another kind of light from within. No words or deeds may encompass it.

Friendship is another form of love — more passive perhaps, but full of the transmitting and acceptance of things like thunderclouds and grass and the clean granite of reality.

Art is both love and friendship, and understanding; the desire to give. It is not charity, which is the giving of Things, it is more than kindness which is the giving of self. It is both the taking and giving of beauty, the turning out to the light the inner folds of the awareness of the spirit. It is the recreation on another plane of the realities of the world; the tragic and wonderful realities of earth and men, and of all the inter-relations of these.

I wish the thundercloud had moved up over Tahoe and let loose on you; I could wish you nothing finer.



I’ll have these up soon!


KJ: Peter and Alex have the freedom to
declare the intent of their commitment
in any way they choose
that is truest to their love.

Consequently, they will be reading
the last part of Walt Whitman’s poem

“Song of the Open Road”

P: The road is before us!

A: It is safe—I have tried it—my own feet have tried it well—be not detain’d!

P: Let the paper remain on the desk unwritten, and the book on the shelf unopen’d!

A: Let the tools remain in the workshop! let the money remain unearn’d!

P: Let the school stand! mind not the cry of the teacher!

A: Let the preacher preach in his pulpit! let the lawyer plead in the court, and the judge expound the law.

A: Camerado, I give you my hand!
I give you my love more precious than money,
I give you myself before preaching or law;
Will you give me yourself? will you come travel with me?
Shall we stick by each other as long as we live?


P: Camerado, I give you my hand!
I give you my love more precious than money,
I give you myself before preaching or law;
Will you give me yourself? will you come travel with me?
Shall we stick by each other as long as we live?



KJ: Peter and Alex, today you are declaring to yourselves,
your family, your friends, and all of the universe,
that your love knows no bounds,
that it will grow and change.

The wedding ring is a circle
symbolizing the sun and the earth,
the stars in the sky and the electrons
in your every atom.

It is a symbol of wholeness,
perfection, and peace.

May these rings always remind you
of your love.

KJ: Alex, please give Peter his ring, and repeat after me: Peter, accept this ring as a reminder of the wholeness of our shared love.

A: Peter, accept this ring as a reminder of the wholeness of our shared love.

KJ: Peter, please give Alex his ring, and repeat after me: Alex, accept this ring as a reminder of our wholeness of our shared love.

P: Alex, accept this ring as a reminder of our wholeness of our shared love.


Peter and Alex, your love is a flame,
which consumes and enlivens you,
which warms your hearts, and will light your paths.

On behalf of everyone gathered today,
I wish for you the greatest of adventures,
the highest of heights,
and the richest of beauty.

We also wish that in your journeys,
you find equality, freedom, health,
growth, and humor.

We wish that you continue to grow
as individuals, together, and as a family.

We hope that you together find a home
full of joy, peace, wisdom, and above all else, love.

And now,
by the power vested in me by you, your family, your friends, and all the universe,

I now pronounce you husband and husband!



Peter: Thank you, everyone!

Alex: You are all invited to join us as we go out into the world.

We will be putting on our coats and boots and

will be waiting for everyone in 5 minutes to participate

in a snow labyrinth ceremony outside.


One thought on “Big Gay Fancy Camp

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